At the age of 19, I had a huge realisation, which was that in certain situations I chose to act like a victim and some of my peers would pick up on this insecurity within me and try to belittle me, which made me extremely angry and only made my victimisation continue.
Then I went on the Landmark Advanced Course. I had Alain Roth as the trainer on the course, a French man with a brilliant sense of humour and an incredible ability to coach and get to the heart of an issue. I was the leader of a team during the programme and on one occasion I messed up. We had finished late one evening and I had let my team go without encouraging them to complete the homework task. I let them go because I didn’t want to step on their toes, I didn’t want to challenge their ego, I didn’t want to make them uncomfortable.
The next day when a few of my team members had not completed the task, Alain asked everyone what the problem was. Even though I was scared, I plucked up the courage to put up my hand. I stood up and explained honestly that my team had failed because I did not ask them to stay behind – I said all this with my head down in shame. Alain bluntly questioned me “Do you know how you’re being right now?”. The question shocked and confused me. I replied honestly “No, I don’t”. He pointed to the white board to the left of the room which contained all the terms about the world of survival. One of those words on that board stood out to me: victim. I was acting like a victim, like I had done something wrong, and I was turning Alain into a higher authority, into a judge, who I was admitting my fault to with a feeling of shame. I didn’t realise I was doing it, until I had a realisation of it. Until he caught me in the moment of doing it.
At that time, I also used to think that my religion Sikhism was superior to all other religions. In some corner of my psyche there was some uneasiness towards other religions such as Hinduism, Islam and Christianity. I’m telling you this honestly because I don’t want you to fall into the same trap. Then God and Guru made me meet lots of living spiritual masters who, after much difficulty of my ego, I eventually bowed before at their feet (something most Sikhs would gasp at even the thought of). However, doing this act destroyed all my uneasiness and ego about other religions not being as good as mine, and all my uneasiness around people of other faiths. In time, through my various spiritual experiences I also was blessed to meet Jesus Christ and Lord Krishna in the subtle realms.
Unfortunately, most Sikhs are not so lucky (and I emphasise most) – they retain this victim ideology and ego of superiority. They continue to feel that the Indian Government is oppressing them, that mysterious extremist Hindu groups and Muslim groups are oppressing them and that they are the powerless victims of some huge scam, that they have been denied their rights, whilst continuing to believe that they have the best religion in the world. I realised how ridiculous all this was when I was 19. It’s time for Sikhs to grow up and stop being so childish and so reactive to events and situations. I agree that history should be remembered, and justice should be served where it is due, but a Sikh should never live in the past and should replace their anger with forgiveness and focus on building a new and exciting future through pro-activeness and level-headed intelligent strategy.
So when I see Sikhs all piped up with anger, hatred and protesting without any consciousness or intelligence, I honestly feel ashamed and sad to admit that these are my people. I’m not stereotyping my own people, and nor am I blaming them or putting them down, but just stating an objective fact of how the current group consciousness of most Sikhs is and how it makes me feel. Of course, we also have some real gems amongst us who are genuinely bright shining torches on Earth and who have long transcended these primitive behaviours – but they are sadly very few and far in-between.
However I should make it clear that, this acting like a victim problem is not a Sikh problem at all, its a human problem which is rooted in the lack of development of a human being’s consciousness and self-awareness – it’s nothing to do with one’s religion at all. If anything, ironically, religion was meant to be a cure to overcome all automatic, sheep-like unconscious behaviour.
Today though, I see people from all different backgrounds acting like victims and other people acting like oppressors and each one thinks they are superior than the other – these are ultimately just childish plays of the ego. I have met Christians, Jews, Muslims, Hindus and Buddhists all who act like victims either as individuals or as groups and I’ve also met individuals from each faith who have transcended the trappings of acting like a victim or oppressor. Even some very religious and spiritual individuals suffer from this conditioning by becoming a victim to God and turning God into an oppressor [This is a very advanced topic to be covered later on in greater depth].
Guru Nanak said it perfectly when he said “No one is high and no one is low”. So why then do we still choose to treat some people like heros in awe and lower ourselves before them, and at the same time, treat others like shit because we think we are better than them? Both are very primitive ways of being. The correct way of being is to see everyone as equals, all religions as equal, even God as an equal to you. This way of thinking is difficult for the ego which either wants to lower you or make you bigger.
The consciousness of humanity is evolving ladies and gentlemen. A new dawn is coming. A dawn in which these petty plays and acts of the ego have long been forgotten and where each man and woman stands before one another with folded hands bowing gracefully and honouring the humanity in the other as an equal, irrespective of religion, colour, race, gender, sexual orientation or social status. Sat Naam.
Tagged: alain roth, ego, jasdeep hari bhajan singh khalsa, landmark advanced course, landmark forum, victim